I don't feel like it happened, but it did. I need to feel like it existed like it happened, like I was there. Sure there were bad times, but goddamn it all to hell, there were good times too. That was my family for almost six years.

I fucking miss burying my face into someone's back, into someone's chest, just to have that comfort. They don't even have to hold me, they don't even have to touch me aside from the contact I make with them, I just fucking miss it.

I haven't really blogged in awhile and I miss that too.

And, totally unrelated to the above...just wrote this, literally just. I'm amazed by it...hope that's not wrong...


Here with me pressed against your chest
Breathing in, breathing out
A heartbeat to set the pace

Gently run your hands across my face
Cast the spell that calms and soothes

Every curve I fit
A mold that holds me safely in place

Tender sighs let me know I'm alive
Surrender to something deep and renewing

All the world, it fades away
All the haunts from my day
Hold me close and I will know
You are my home
I am home